Have you ever walked out of a meeting with a gut feeling that something’s not right? There are times when something bothers you, but you don’t quite know what or why. You might have a general idea or just an uncomfortable feeling that something is wrong. Ask yourself, “What’s really bothering me?” And keep asking.
Don’t just ask, “What’s bothering me?”; ask “Why is it bothering me?” Often what we experience on the surface is not what’s really bothering us. It’s something much deeper. Let’s say someone is late to a meeting, yet again. You might be bothered by this person’s tardiness, but deep down, you might really be upset because you are worried the other person is no longer committed to the project or you could interpret lateness as a lack of respect. Sometimes the “what” and “why” are obvious, but more often than not, it takes time to reflect on what and why something is bothering me.